Have you noticed the uptick in the broad use of the words empath, empathy, empathetic over the past several years? Honestly, in a lot of ways, it feels as if the recent rediscovery of the word allows one to hint at being psychic …ish… without sounding all too irrational, metaphysical, or pseudo-sciencey. Calling one’s self empathic evokes something much closer to a Myers-Briggs personality type than a super-power, but still carries with it an extra air of authority. Does it not? It certainly seems like a more interesting, if not a more powerful claim than merely being a sympathetic person. I am not sure how I would begin to count the number of acquaintances I have online who have suddenly announced to the world that they are an empath, almost always using the noun form, because who cares if I post something that hints I am sympathetic…that just seems menial if not somehow snobby and insensitive.
The word empathetic itself connotes sharing an other’s feelings as if they were your own, being like-minded, or even taking on another’s feelings and experiencing them personally. It is sympathy 2.0 on steroids. Right? And if you do it all the time, then, well, you are kinda special.
I certainly see the appeal, and I’d be lying if I didn’t admit to personally reading through more than one list about “self-care tips for the empath,” with hopes for some great personal insight might inform why my specialness makes the world just so burdensome to me. (And before you accuse me of not being empathetic to empaths thus far, not, I am just not being very gentle. That is different). I just find myself wondering why all this empathy talk has managed to invent a whole new form of entitlement or even narcissism. And yes, I am speaking for myself a little here… The question I am left with is, when we have tweaked something so important beyond recognition, what do we do about it?